Monday, August 16, 2010

Awake from the Nightmare!

I'M BACK! HOORAY!! YES!!! The past weekend was just awful! Chemo has never been that bad and I am so glad that the worst of it is over. I woke up this morning and knew I'd have a good day because I didn't think of running to get my meds first thing my feet hit the floor! What a blessing to feel awake from that nightmare of a weekend I had. Over the weekend, I was overwhelmed by a headache worse than any migraine I have ever had. I could actually HEAR the blood flowing in and out of my head it was throbbing so bad. I slept more than I was awake. My jaw was in pain, but I could stand it because my whole body ached this time. My lower back started killing me again. If this is what back labor is like...I'm gonna be a pro! And literally every hair follicle on my body just HURT. I just laid in the bath tub pouring water over my body. I even saw some of my hair follicles bleeding on my head...OUCHY!!! I was actually glad Andrew wasn't around much this weekend (Blake is back from the Marines!!!) because I literally felt like I was 15 again I was so emotional and moody. I wasn't a nice Laura this weekend, so he kept some distance:) Kayla came over at the end of the week for egg drop soup and a movie...she helped me get out of my funk mood like always! I was sad though, because I wanted to go to Union Chapel on Sunday morning, but my body had different plans I guess. I'm so glad I listened...see I'm getting better at listening! ;) But it's ok, now Andrew gets to go with me next week and I will be feeling much more up to it anyway.

I'm going to try to do my best to keep things in order in my life from now on. I really let this round get to me and I don't like feeling out of control. I've just learned my lesson that it is better to just pray to God than be mad at the situation...it just saves you some time in the end :) So maybe this was a lesson learned through cancer. When you are going through a bad time, go directly to God for comfort, cause I wasted a good day and a half being mad when if I would have just seeked some comfort in the beginning, it could have been a different story. It's really not about how you got down in the first place, what really matters is how fast you pick yourself back (you can thank the Hoff for that one! ;) But it's true, get yourself back up and keep fighting. The second I quit fighting my battle with cancer, is the second cancer gets a step ahead of me. And I'm too strong to ever let it beat me!

Today was fun and relaxing...I was much better company today :) Took Cooper to the vet and he is perfect! Sat in the shade with the cool breeze today...LOVED IT! And had wonderful conversations in my back yard with my 'Other Mom Judi' and then out to eat at the new Fat Jacks with the ladies...(and Josh ;) Just a fun way to celebrate me feeling a little like my old self today. I love feeling good, I swear, and I will celebrate that fact that I feel good anyday now! And I took a pill so I was able to eat Pizza and not die from it...I LOVE MEDS!!! Tomorrow is another day to relax...and then a hair date with Ash...here we go, stay tuned!!!

2 comments:

  1. I am so happy you are feeling better!! Thanks for keeping us posted thru the blogs, I am always wondering how you are doing. You are such an AWESOME person! Love and Prayers, Kelly

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  2. And you thought your hair was your bestest feature? Has anyone told you now that you are wearing hats and we can't see your hair that your best and most beautiful feature is your eyes! I noticed that at Fat Jack's. Just didn't get a chance to tell you before your friends came! Look in a mirror and you will see I am right!

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