Coach to Laura – Time Out in the Game!

Dear Laura,

Okay, in football analogy let me say that you thought the game was going in your favor and so did we field coaches. But alas, the coaches from the press box (aka – cancer coaches from yesterday) saw things we could not see and instructed us to call a timeout and get refocused.
They saw things (low white/red blood cell counts and high liver enzyme counts) along with your chest discomfort and immediately instructed us to stop the game temporarily (until next Thursday). They instructed us to insert a new wrinkle into our game plan (3 shots over 3 days to get cell counts back up). After the time out is over they told us they would assess how things are going later (next Thursday) and they will decide then on how to finish the game with what plays.

Isn’t it amazing how sometimes God reminds us He is still in control and knows what is best for us. The three words on my wedding ring mom had engraved are the beginnings of my morning prayer – Faith, Hope, and Love.
My prayer begins by asking Him to help me grow today in those three areas by saying: Love – May we learn to Love others as thou hath loved us; Hope – The Hope for world peace and people’s inner peace; and Faith - To trust in thee with all our hearts and lean not unto our own understanding and in all ways acknowledge you knowing you will direct our paths. It is this Faith area I struggle with the most but also the area I have probably grown in the most.

It is the dad in me that says my choice for your “Pursuit” would have been a sprint to the finish line of being healed/being cured and not the marathon that it takes. But that was not my call. Okay, so the literature says it is a marathon, but still I did not want you to physically, mentally and emotionally suffer. But that was not my call. Remember, my ultimate prayer had always been that it would be me who would get “something” and never mom or you children. But that was not my call. My hope for any couple in their first year of marriage would not have been to go through what Andrew and you have gone through. But that was not my call. These have not been any of our calls to make.

It keeps coming back to the trust we must maintain when we cannot explain things. But too, it is the trust that we must maintain when we can explain things. I wish it were 100% of the time that I understand why things are as they are but that is not to be. Enter again the Faith that is central to our Christianity and our daily living with God directing our paths.
When I was in that special unit overseas someone before me had painted a picture in our barracks and it hung on the wall of our communication center. It was a nasty looking military man and under the picture the guy had taken the 23rd Psalm and made a different interpretation almost line-for-line. The one line I want to mention is where he said, Yea though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death I will fear no evil for I am the meanest son-of-a-bitch in the valley. That, and his entire analogy, was to say our unit was self-sufficient because we could handle/do anything because we were a 30 man special group. That was supposed to bring us peace of mind on a daily basis as we went about our business. Many times we would joke about that picture and his inscriptions underneath. Too many people believe they are self-sufficient and are in complete control of their lives and they have not learned how to let go and let God.

Years later Psalms 23 came to mean something more about letting go and letting God in my life. The exact verse about how “He prepares a feast for me in the presence of my enemies” was totally awesome and it just jumped out at me. The clearest part of the verse that spoke to me was that if my God would take the time to prepare a feast for me in the presence of my enemies He would surely make me safe to enjoy it. He did not narrowly define who my enemies were so it did not matter – He would take care of things and if he would take care of that He would take care of all things if I let go. Wow, that picture painted a thousand words for me and almost makes me too confident and daring when I think about it even today. That is the kind of Shepherd or Leader I want in my daily life!

Make no mistake about it Laura, your blogs have shown us how to Keep the Faith as you interpret what has been going on since June 17th and subsequently with The Pursuit. We know who your Shepherd is and we know you believe he knows what is better for you than you/we do. We take a “peace of mind” in that understanding and we thank you for it. But also make no mistake about it that when you are hurting or disappointed we share that also!
So realize, this is a marathon you are involved in and your Faith will sustain you through it. Our bracelets say “Never Give In” for many reasons and in the analogy of a marathon remember to:

• Keep the mental and psychological pace – God will take care of the physical pace so fight through the physical battles inherit in the race knowing that,
• Keep a sharp image of all this being worth it when you cross the finish line and are healed/cured,
• Know that there are people who may finish ahead of you in the race but just maybe somehow you finished right where you were supposed to because your Good Shepherd knew you better than you knew yourself.

Sorry for this prolonged “Time Out” but it is now time to get back into the game and continue The Pursuit. As they do during timeouts, they listen to the words from their coach like you just did, they take a swallow of an energy drink and wipe their brows of their sweat. Your Faith is your energy that will sustain you and God will continuously wipe away the sweat and tears as you proceed through The Pursuit.

Thanks “Me Lorla” and catch you later with a victory speech as originally planned.
Love,
Dad